“Knowing others is intelligence. Knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power” Lao Tzu
We often think about leadership as something we do to, and for, others yet it always starts with us. Without this deep understanding of ourselves we can not be effective leaders or lead with confidence. It’s our inner game and how as leaders we lead from the inside out. A concept I refer to as self-mastery. Whether it’s martial arts or meditation the zen masters have a deep intimate knowledge of themselves and the utmost self control as a result.
When we have mastered ourselves the rest is easy, but mastering ourselves is also one of the hardest things to achieve.
When we have developed self-mastery, we move forward consciously and steadily towards our goals. We know our purpose, and we have the self-discipline needed to do things in an intentional, focused way. Self-mastery also means mastering our emotions, impulses, and actions, and is vital in terms of leadership brand.
Self-mastery refers to the ability to control and regulate your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours in order to achieve goals. It involves developing a deep understanding of yourself, including strengths, weaknesses, and values, and using this knowledge to cultivate inner peace, emotional intelligence, and a strong sense of purpose. Self-mastery requires discipline, perseverance, and a willingness to continuously learn and grow, both as a person and as a leader.
A conscious leader is aware, not just of themselves but also of others and their environment. Conscious leaders are awake to opportunities, they can read a room and they often know what’s going on before anyone has spoken a word. This deep awareness gives them an advantage and is achieved through self mastery.
The best ways to build awareness are through reflective practices and gathering feedback. Self mastery isn’t about controlling yourself or dominating those fearful parts within us. It’s about getting to know these parts, but then transcending them. It’s why it’s such a challenge because on one hand we have the drive for growth and yet on the other hand a need for safety and these two psychological needs can often compete in this space. We stop when it gets hard or want to run when the fear arises and yet it’s an inevitable part of our growth.
Self mastery is not to be confused with confidence. Just because we think we’re great or have it figured out doesn’t mean it’s true. In fact it’s more likely to indicate we’ve not mastered ourself and is a common theme among narcissists.
Self mastery is to be aware of your strengths and limitations, self disciplined to work on yourself and grow with the self control to exert a strong will against our impulses to steer our inner ship with equanimity.
It’s a commitment to never-ending improvement; it’s a process of becoming. This journey of self mastery requires us to find ways to transcend fear and break through resistance.
According to Deepak Chopra to be focused on the path of Self-Mastery requires us to be one-pointed without being rigid. It requires us to stay alert, unemotional, and mature. To be firm without oppression, to be resolved without judgment, to be strong with humility. It requires us to practice silence and stillness so our inner wisdom can reveal itself. Self-Mastery also requires us to be courageous, to step out from the crowd.
My advice is always to take it slowly. Self mastery can take years so patience is a must. Always ask yourself “what have I learned from this?” Take small steps along the path by setting small goals. Go easy on yourself and know we’re all a work in progress and this doesn’t stop us also being a masterpiece at the same time.
What does your personal development plan look like? What’s your vision for your future self? What kind of leader are you and who do you want to be?